He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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