Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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