oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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