Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
my liver is dry heaving
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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