so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
