He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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