Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
