The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I will pee on everything he values.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
