We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My penis needs a shock collar
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
