i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
