Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize