last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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