We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
this will be a night to untag.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
