Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
