I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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