we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
