What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
