The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
this hospital has no fireball
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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