Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
