last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
