lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
