This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
