I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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