So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
