The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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