I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize