god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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