Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I will be naked everywhere
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Randomize
