I hate all girls vehemently.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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