I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Randomize