Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
