I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
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