would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
