ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
