Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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