My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
