I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize