"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
