You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
