Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Randomize