Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize
