let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize