Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
