Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize