actually, I'm a sock model
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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