The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
