hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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