Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
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