So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
