This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
