Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
